Trigger warning: there is mention of sexual assault in this post.

A teenage girl was sexually assaulted in her room. The police came; they took her statement and packed her clothes and bed sheets for evidence.

The police believed her and started their investigation, but her foster moms had doubts.

Why?

She seemed detached from the whole incident, and her behaviour wasn’t ‘typical’ of a victim.

For instance, when it was time to get a new bedsheet, she insisted on buying the same type she had on her bed when the incident happened. More …

You entered the year full of hope and dreams

You had your plans laid out and your goals defined

You told God everything you wanted, and you received it all by faith

You had your sleeves rolled up, you were ready to do the hard work

But the storms came and swept you off your path More …

A woman saw a wild animal charging from the woods. She fired three shots in the air to scare it away, but it did not turn back. It caught up with her and pounced on her. She was severely wounded, but she survived.

A security camera nearby captured the incident, and everyone who watched the video asked her one question. “Why did you not shoot directly at it when it was obvious it was coming to get you?”

She said she thought the warning shots would be enough to make it turn away. Then someone asked her, “Did it show you that same mercy when it came for you?” She said no.

That wild animal is like the limiting beliefs, bad habits and toxic situations that relentlessly try to maul us physically, mentally, emotionally or financially.

Take every chance to save yourself; do not hesitate to face them head-on and get them down before they bring you down.

African society stigmatizes women for many things!

For suffering from an illness, living with a disability, having a special needs child, being unmarried or divorced or childless, being a single parent, a widow or a victim of abuse. The list goes on!

They want to see you shrinking, and they want you to keep showing up for pity parties.

But you don’t have to. More …

Your light can be pure and bright and still not able to conquer some thick darknesses.

A million years of your radiance may not even be able to match a minute of their murk.

Maybe another light will illuminate them, or the darkness will last their lifetime.

Whatever it is, you need to know that territory does not have to be yours to take. More …

A job came my way some time ago, and it was precisely the kind of role I wanted; it ticked all the boxes I had for my next job at that time.

I wanted to twirl in excitement, but I had not even been called for an interview yet, so I did not.

Some days later, I was invited for an interview. I had it, and it was good.

I wanted to order a Baileys chocolate cake to celebrate, but I had yet to receive feedback about the interview, so I did not. More …

One minute, I was in bed watching a cave diving video; the next, I was in a dream, talking with Seyi.

Seyi is someone from my childhood that I have not seen or been in contact with for over ten years, not even on social media, but here she was in my dream!

Some minutes after I woke up, I checked my phone, and guess what I saw – a message from Seyi! More …

There are two women communities I belong to on Facebook.

The first group was created by a woman who suffered physical and emotional abuse in her previous marriage.

In her community, she teaches women never to settle for less. She has settled for less before and knows it is not worth it.

The second group was created by a woman with one of the most beautiful marriages I know.

In her community, she teaches women they can have the best in marriage. She has done it, so she knows it is possible.

I have followed their work for almost a decade and seen how they have impacted the lives of thousands of women in their groups.

Out of a bad marriage and out of a good marriage have come life experiences that have helped to raise many women who now make better choices in their relationships.

They have used their different marriage experiences to serve the same good purpose.

Some time ago, I got a glass bowl and packs of Post-it notes in different colours.

Every day, I wrote one thing I was grateful for on a Post-it note, folded it into a perfect square and dropped it into the bowl.

Many days, I did; some days, I didn’t. No pressure.

One day, I needed more space in my chest of drawers, so I moved the bowl somewhere else, and over time, I thought less about it!

Yesterday, I was shopping online for a journal and saw a gratitude journal; it reminded me of my bowl.

So, I brought out my big gratitude bowl full of colourful notes!

Then I did something I had not done before – I read all the notes!

I was in awe, remembering the stories behind each note –  little miracles that have filled my life.

My heart burst open with gratitude for all the answered prayers and little everyday miracles my life has been filled with!

Your life, too, is filled with thousands of miracles. Notice them

***

It is so easy for us to look at people celebrating their big wins on social media with the hashtag #childofgrace and think grace is only for some special people.

No, it is not; if you are here living and breathing, grace is available for you too.

Do you remember someone who rose to help you without asking for anything? That was grace.

Do you remember when you escaped what could have been a fatal injury? That was grace.

Do you remember the pain in your body that suddenly disappeared? That was grace.

Do you remember when you got that opportunity, even when you had given up? That was grace.

Do you remember when you got a piece of information that changed your life for the better? That was grace.

Do you remember how you were protected from the bad consequences of a wrong choice? That was grace.

Do you remember when your needs were met in ways you did not see coming? That was grace.

Do you remember that thing you thought would destroy you, but it made you stronger? That was grace.

You know that good thing you are so gifted at doing better than others? That is grace.

Do you remember that song and the message you stumbled on? The ones that helped you hold on to faith during a hard time? That was grace.

Even going out and returning home to lay your head down at the end of this day is grace!

So, wake up daily in the consciousness of and gratitude for the grace available to you.

Let go of doubts, let go of fear, let go of comparisons, open up your heart and embrace God’s ever-present grace.

Be courageous to live, dream and pursue opportunities.

Ask, seek and knock, knowing that there is a power higher than you are, able to watch out for you, make way for you and send help your way.